When I read about the topic in #Gen2GenChange asking about a social practice that doesn’t hold good for the present or future generation, then one moment resurfaced from my wedding memories.
In Bengali weddings, there is a ritual where the bride has to wash her groom’s feet and pat them dry with her hair. Yes, you read it right. I agree this sounds strange and trust me no matter how much you love your partner, it still gives you a strange feeling when you have to do it in the presence of your in-laws.
There are no points for guessing that I too had washed and dried my husband’s feet after our wedding. But later on, my over-analytical mind made me question the need of this ritual. If it had anything to do with the display of my devotion and loyalty towards my husband, then I guess I had already done the job by marrying him and coming to his house leaving my own behind.
Let me clear one thing at first. I have no problem in washing my husband’s feet. If he gives me a chance, I would be happy to even pedicure them. Rituals or no rituals, I am aware of my duties as a wife. My problem lies in making this hygienic activity a full fledged wedding ritual. Whoever had started this tradition, must say, he didn’t find any other better way to assert the superior position that a husband holds in the marriage. This is how he had wished to see a marriage between two individuals ages back. I don’t see another reason behind such a ritual otherwise. Centuries have passed after that. The ritual is still occupying a firm seat.
In today’s date, we change our mobile phones at least once in a year. We don’t want to fall behind with the old technologies and are eager to embrace ourselves with the newest ones. We don’t hesitate to post messages in social media against any crime happening to women. But ask us to discard some age old traditions going inside our homes like washing husband’s feet and make some new changes luminescent instead. See what happens after this.
You will find us scared in the name of God and every possible bad luck in our lives. We become so blind with fear that we often forget that marriage is the most sacred bond in His eyes where two grown up people agree to be each other’s support system for the rest of their lives. There is none superior or inferior to Him.
Writing or posting about pointless social practices can never be enough. We should take our own steps to remove them from our lives in real. For me, it would be educating my child to question it’s conscience a thousand times before following some traditions blindly.
Do you find any such ritual/custom/tradition that provokes you to stand against it? Share with me.