Indian weddings! The word ‘wedding’ itself brings a smile on everyone’s face. When it comes to India, then weddings are never a one-day event.
Thanks to the Indian entertainment industry, Indian weddings are a grand affair these days. Before reciting the wedding mantras, bride and groom celebrate at least 3-4 days of pre-wedding ceremonies. Everyone is ready to go one step ahead and make their wedding day a talked-about event.
Of course, there is nothing wrong with it. This occasion comes only once in life (for most of the people). So, it’s a very natural wish for the couple-to-be to make their D-day an unforgettable affair. And, believe me it indeed turns into one such memorable day for them – mostly because of their wedding arrangements and rest due to some special contributions which you will read later in this post.
Generally, Indian weddings reflect a big social event. You will see everyone in happy mood, dressed in their best outfits & best behaviour. Everything looks so bright and beautiful. Does it look like a happy family gathering scene straight out of Sooraj Barjatya movie set? Do I sound too good to be true ?
Certainly……..I mean certainly not !
As long as your interest lies only in enjoying the movie, then it doesn’t matter whatever happened behind the scenes.
But, if you are someone who has an equally nosy nature like me, then your eyes will discover below 5 favourite discussion topics in Indian weddings :
1. Features of the bride :
The bride is__________ . Fill in the blank with any of these words – dark complexioned/thin/fat/short/tall/having short hair.
This discussion topic finds the topmost position in Indian weddings amongst the guests. We have taken the matter of women empowerment so seriously that the groom’s features don’t matter to us much. So what if he is an equally dark-complexioned person with low-fat or full-fat appearance. He is still a very handsome guy and will surely touch all heights of life with his almost bald head and abbreviated figure.
2. ‘No’ to dowry :
‘You know nobody takes dowry these days. Still, are you giving anything to your daughter?’ this is the most civilised inquiry one does (with a smile) in Indian weddings. Everyone knows that giving and receiving dowry is an evil practise in today’s date. So, everyone is strictly against dowry. That’s why, nobody demands dowry in their son’s wedding.
But parents want to ‘gift’ their daughters as much as possible in weddings, sometimes go out of their way. They think it’s much better to reply the above question with some ‘materialistic’ words rather than standing with a blank face. No wonder daughters are still liabilities in this country.
3. Give and take offer :
‘Blessings only in presence, not present’ is seen in very few wedding cards where the family members politely refuse wedding presents from the invitees. Rest of the wedding invites don’t contain this sentence or anything of similar stature. Without mentioning this special line, the act of giving gifts becomes a pre-requisite to attend the wedding. And, what do we do when we receive gifts ? Either we lock them in our cupboards for distant future use or gift them in another wedding.
4. Giveaways :
There is a strange custom of giving new clothes to the close relatives in Indian weddings. In the period of inflation where arranging a wedding and shopping for the family itself is a big challenge, distributing clothes to others in this scenario looks illogical. I don’t know who started this tradition, but it’s there in our system since long time. Everyone, who attends a wedding, anyway buys a new dress or wears a nice dress. So, why is there any need of giving away clothes ?
These giveaways only arise arguments and misunderstandings between the giver and receiver. However, it also contributes in spicing up the discussions during the tea-time snacks.
5. Food critics :
No matter how much expensive and tasty the food is, it is always hard to satisfy the ardent critics. Guests feel it as their birth right to criticise the food in Indian weddings. Everybody seem to have their own set of complaints about food.
In this country, a large section of population is under Below Poverty Line (BPL). Beggars and hungry children waiting for some leftover food outside a wedding/funeral or any celebration venue is a very common scene. I don’t understand how people in such country even dare to complain about such vast variety of dishes displayed before them in weddings.
So, you see, arranging a wedding and marrying in India is not an easy job. As a matter of fact, without the above discussion topics, Indian weddings rather feel incomplete. Hope I still receive wedding invites after this post 😉
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Very interesting how there are unique customs in India and likely every country when it comes to weddings. I hope that the food leftovers are given to those who are hungry.
Yes Doreen. It is distributed. Still it is disheartening to see hungry people when we are busy complaing about the food taste.
Indian weddings always look so bright and colourful! It was great learning more about a wedding from a different culture. The asian weddings I go to are quite westernized (as I was born and raised in Australia) but take elements from Chinese weddings. For example, when I get married, I would like to incorporate the Chinese tea ceremony into my wedding which is a way for the bride and groom to show respect to our families.
Each part of the world has it’s own culture when it comes to weddings. We can adapt any culture we like to celebrate the special moment in our life. Just need to take care of only one thing- never hurt anyone’s feelings in the name of rituals, pomp & show.
I have only been to one Indian wedding and that was when Yyoti Scindia married my friend Priya. Considering that it was a long time ago I don’t remember the topics discussed but it lasted for days and was fantastic for a Westerner to attend.
Yes Indian weddings are a real gorgeous event. The discussions happen behind the back. So,it needs years of experience of attending to actually realise them. But they only add some spice and end within few days till the next topic comes
Moumita, I first learned about Indian weddings during a fun ladies get together I hosted a few years ago. One friend, Kavita, told us all about her 3-day long Indian wedding. She is a natural story teller and had all us Americans howling in laughter at her descriptions of everything that goes on during an Indian wedding. Not that USA weddings are boring affairs, but the different customs were great to learn about. We all wanted to see pictures of the colors of clothes and the variety of foods. Fun post.
I am glad RoseMary that you enjoyed reading the post 🙂
Yes, Indian weddings are rich with culture and tradition. But these 5 discussion topics add some flavours and fun into the event. Without these gossips weddings seem blunt in our side.
I have not yet had the priviledge of attending an Asian wedding. I do admit to looking at wedding photographs online. Asian weddings are such a community event with a high number of guests. I like their attire – so glamorous.
In a number of ways, Nigerians celebrate weddings similar to Asians. They pay a dowry and buy clothes and other items to give to the bride’s family.
Every wedding in each part of the world has it’s own culture.But it looks like Indian and Nigerian tradition is similar to each other in several ways
Your observations are so accurate. Very interesting and beautifully written post.
Thank you Savita
So interesting. I never knew it was such a huge event for the weddings there.
I truly enjoyed reading about it, thanks for sharing.
Thanks William ☺
Our Indian weddings have a charm of their own.
I enjoy myself a lot 🙂 Especially the food ;);)
Yes Anita. I enjoy the weddings too